I'm not going to be predictable and wait until Jan. 1 to make this declaration. Now is the time to speak it. Now is the time to start it.
I, Brandon Davon Billingsworth Oliver IX, am getting my shit together.
If that's too cryptic f
I've tried numerous times before to get my straight-man's Richard Simmons on, using countless methods -- i.e., unsupervised workouts, cabbage soup diet, aerobics, fasting, two weeks of P.E. the summer before my high school freshman year, etc. I now realize what I lack when it came to my previous weight-loss attempts was support from my family and friends. They weren't being pricks; they just didn't know I was trying to get my non-combative Billy Blanks on. Any time I tried to carve the fat, I treated it like secret so well-guarded even the Illuminati wouldn't discover it. I'm not sure if it was out of embarrassment or just not wanting to get people's hopes up, but it was my secretive pet project.
But as I get older, my level of fucks given diminishes. As a result, I don't mind if people know I have a desire to get my beach body in time for Speedo season. I actually want people to know. Since I moved back home, I've noticed my life getting better, bit by bit. New job, getting closer with and making friends, road tripping, getting health insurance. But one should never get complacent. One should strive to get better and better with each day. So next on my agenda is improving myself physically and aesthetically -- the Get My Shit Together campaign. In an effort to get my shit together, I have to part with some of my old ways.
I rebuke thee, fast food.
Get thee behind, snack machine.
Get the hell out of my face, sugary, caffeinated beverages.
Adieu, sweet foods.
Sugar, we're just not going to be able to meet up like we did in the old days.
Fried foods, I'm no longer your beaten wife. I'm not coming back...OK, maybe a bit. But it won't be like it was.
Hit the bricks, large portions.
Taking an elevator up one flight of stairs, we've never been friends, and it's going to stay that way.
Pork, to me, you are now swine. And you know how black folks feel about swine.
Milkshakes and fatty ice cream, GTFO
And as much as this kills me to say it, alcohol we can't see each other like we used to. Whenever Jose, Jim, Comrade Smirnoff, Mr. Sinclare and the rest party too hard, I wind up bloated yet inexplicably in the mood for two McDoubles and fries.
So what I need from my family, friends and readers is your support in my journey to hit the 200-250 lb mark. I'm looking into a gym membership in Palatka. Once I start going to the gym, I need you all to make me keep going. Encourage me to pack my lunch for work and not hit up any dubious eateries. Support the lie that cucumbers and carrots are just as delicious as Ruffles and Cheetos.
So, family, friends, readers and "friends," I need your help with this, my most daring adventure yet. Keep me motivated; don't let me stop. It's a bit unrealistic for me to completely give up the aforementioned foods/drinks, but make sure if you see me with any of them, question it. If you know of any foods that are a must for my healthy diet, I'm open to your suggestions. Hell if you know of any cookbooks I need in my life, do not hesitate to suggest it. And once I start going to the gym, I need you all to make sure I go on a constant basis.
Support the lie that cucumbers and carrots are just as delicious as Ruffles and Cheetos,B.rand
8 comments:
I support you in this bro! I too need to get up and exercise myself. Now if only I could convince myself that pizza was evil...
Hey Capital B! I'm proud of you for making this step. I'll be behind you ALL the way...screaming at you to go to the gym and slapping Ruffles out of your hands.
As for foods, a blender is your friend. I buy frozen fruits or fruits canned in their own juice and some sherbet and make smoothies. Also frozen skinless chicken breasts + salad + light dressing = quick and easy lunch/dinner.
Mr. Smith's comment also reminded me of the little english muffin pizzas, which can be quick, easy, and healthy.
Let me get off your comments and just text you.
Yo man! It maybe hard, but stick with it. Make small goals. For example, this week I'll consume xyz calories. Take it bit by bit. As far as encouragement, I think you have to reach deep down within as well. No one will push you like you. Peace!!!!
Hey B.O! I'm with you; I'm trying to do the same thing.
I am so uncommitted and I just have to remember that it didn't take a week to put it on, so it won't take a week to take it off.
Let's be dilligent! WE CAN DO IT!
Shit man, that's good. My brother was recently diagnosed with diabetes and he's starting to get his act together too. He's lost quite a bit of weight. The trick is to no overdo it. Baby steps.
you can totally do it, Brandon! If this life long fat girl can shed 66 pounds (and going) so can you! I've even gotten to a point where I look forward to my workouts. Who would've thought that could happen EVER. I cut out soda and sugary foods and fried foods and I made myself a curfew for eating b/c I was a late night eater for sure. Looking back I probably doubled my caloric intake after midnight. Good going Brandon. It takes a lot of courage to get your shit together... P.S. - walking is your friend :)
you can totally do it, Brandon! If this life long fat girl can shed 66 pounds (and going) so can you! I've even gotten to a point where I look forward to my workouts. Who would've thought that could happen EVER. I cut out soda and sugary foods and fried foods and I made myself a curfew for eating b/c I was a late night eater for sure. Looking back I probably doubled my caloric intake after midnight. Good going Brandon. It takes a lot of courage to get your shit together... P.S. - walking is your friend :)
Pssssst!!! You can do it!!! Sigh...a week ago I started eating healthy...I'll start working out in Jan...A few Months ago I lost 20lbs in a month...I worked out every day (except sun) for 30 mins. Get Jillian Michaels 30 day Shred (10 bucks at wally world). The daily workout is 30mins, and has 3 progressive levels. Trust me, I thought I needed something longer...but this was the ONLY workout I did. The motivation to me was that it was 30mins. After a month or so, you'll build stamina. Just knowing you're getting better at the workout is also motivation to do it 1 more day.
Here are a few tips to help you...
1. Eat carbs in the day time, preferably with breakfast (complex, whole grains only if possible)
2. Dont eat after 7-8ish
3. Water is your friend
4. Cardio will help you lose weight, strength/weight training will help you gain muscle
5. Eat 5 small meals a day (largest in the AM)
6. Calculate how many calories you actually need in a day to survive (google caloric intake calculator) working out+too few calories=losing fat slowly+gaining it back quicker
7. If you reeeaaally wanna get into it, get a free calorie counter app for your phone. Its actually pretty easy, and allows you to see what foods you can eat a whole, helluva lot of (pretty much any fresh veggie)
Once you start eating right, and exercising, your cravings for bad foods will diminish (UNLESS you arent getting enough calories). Its because your bodys blood sugar is more regulated... I was surprised I resisted Debbie cakes and Mickey Ds and any other 'bad' foods for so long!! There was NO temptation!
Anywho, I feel like I've written a novel, but I know you can do it! Sigh...now, I gotta start taking my own advice. lol. If you need anything, or have any questions, you got my #!! I'll be checkin on you too sucka!! Toodles bro!!~Soheyla
Post a Comment